That’s what I feel like these days… like next weekend is Christmas and I am five years old: just able to comprehend how cool this event really is and yet totally overwhelmed by it, all at the same time. My mental state is especially reminiscent of a five-year-old, as I flit about, forgetful one moment, hyperactive the next, made irritable and grouchy by excitement and anticipation.

Frankly, it’s exhausting to be living in two worlds. Mentally and emotionally, I am soo in next week, enjoying my family and friends and soaking in this wonderful once-in-a-lifetime coming together of loved ones from all around.

And yet here’s my body, still sitting at the same desk, doing the same things as I was a month ago and will be a month from now, albeit with a different last name. Every task at work is one more thing that I don’t want to be doing, one more chore to finish before the real focus of my every waking (and some sleeping) moment at last begins. Don’t get me wrong, under normal circumstances I greatly enjoy my job. But right now, there are much bigger things afoot.

Jeez – and we’ve only been engaged for six months! I can’t imagine having done this for longer. But Christmas morning will arrive soon enough, and then I’ll be left in the mounds of wrapping paper, wishing I could go back and do it all over again. So I will savor even this infuriating hurry up and wait time, because it’ll be Boxing Day all too soon.

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